01-01-2016, 07:56 AM
Twas the night before Christmas
And all through the house
Everyone felt shitty
Even the mouse
Mom on the toilet
Dad smoking grass
I had just settled down
For a nice piece of ass.
When out on the roof
I heard such a clatter
I sprang from my piece
To see what was the matter.
Out on the roof
I saw some old prick.
I knew in a moment
It must be St Nick.
He came down the chimney
Like a bat out of hell.
I knew in a second
The fucker had fell.
He filled up the stockings
With whiskey and beer
And a big rubber dick
For my brother, the queer.
He rose up the chimney
With a thundering fart
The son of a bitch
Blew my chimney apart
He swore and he cussed
As he rode out of site
Piss on you all
It's been a hell of a night!
And all through the house
Everyone felt shitty
Even the mouse
Mom on the toilet
Dad smoking grass
I had just settled down
For a nice piece of ass.
When out on the roof
I heard such a clatter
I sprang from my piece
To see what was the matter.
Out on the roof
I saw some old prick.
I knew in a moment
It must be St Nick.
He came down the chimney
Like a bat out of hell.
I knew in a second
The fucker had fell.
He filled up the stockings
With whiskey and beer
And a big rubber dick
For my brother, the queer.
He rose up the chimney
With a thundering fart
The son of a bitch
Blew my chimney apart
He swore and he cussed
As he rode out of site
Piss on you all
It's been a hell of a night!